


How close is close enough?

by Morbid1Curiosity



Category: RWBY
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-26
Updated: 2018-01-26
Packaged: 2019-03-09 12:47:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13481799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morbid1Curiosity/pseuds/Morbid1Curiosity
Summary: This was a weird story for me to write.Mostly it was to… Celebrate? Ending of volume 5. I won’t say anything more about v5, it was what it was, and hopefully we can move on and HOPEFULLY we can receive a better content with the upcoming volumes. Although I’m afraid since they’re launching another “serious’ series which might take resources from RWBY …Second, I like that Ilia survived, a lot of people (Me included) were afraid she would die for some reason, but nope! At least not yet. I like her, hope she sticks around the main group and we can learn more about her.While I support Ilia/Blake ship, this was more for myself, this story that is. And not because I wanted some fluff or whatever. No.This was to help me get a grasp on the new Blake. Because the current Blake is nothing like the old one. She no longer is this quiet, introverted cat girl, she became something different. I did the same with Yang prior to v5 with some of my stories to also get a grasp on her character. Luckly v5 delivered a great bit of information on Yang, so that’s no longer neccesary. Sadly Blake now is in a weird spot, at least for me. I’ll be glad to discuss her with anyone if someone understands her better or doesn’t seem to see the issue I do with her.Lastly, and this is personal, I decided to write this, or rather finally sat down to write this, as a way to cope with how awful my day was. It was really awful, to the point I turned off my phone and any kind of messenger I used (Discord woo!) and just sat down and wrote. This and some other things, but this was my main thing I wanted to work on. Why? Because long ago I thought that offering things to others is a much better way of dealing with your own personal negative moods. I know im just offering my crappy stories, but hey! Hopefuly at least one person (Me not included) will find tihs entertaining.With this being said, I hope you enjoyed this story! Please let me know what you thought about the story, how I portrayed Blake and most importantly how i portrayed Ilia, she’s still iffy for me to grasp. I didn’t try to make her edgy or emo or nothing like that, but you have to admit she’s in a weird spot right now hah. So please do leave a comment/review and let me know how I did! With them and with the story in general!





	How close is close enough?

Ilia stretched as she observed all the celebrating going on below her. She decided to step to the side, climbing to one of the rooftops to enjoy this moment in solitude. It was time to celebrate, as her people were finally on the road to finding peace among themselves.

 

This was a very important issue that a certain black cat brought attention to all of them. That they cannot seek agreement with humans, if first they cannot find such agreement among themselves.

 

Of course this was just one battle in the upcoming war, how long that war was going to be? Nobody knew. She heard some rumors about a bigger threat, but for now? For now it was time to celebrate, to be happy, to rejoice.

 

That was also the reason why she opted to just stand on the side and observe. She didn't want to ruin the mood for anyone. It's not that she was angry or sad over all this, quite the contrary. She was as happy as any of them. Yet there was something that overshadowed this happiness. Her own personal issues.

 

They weren't really issues, just... Emotions and unsolved situations. While the past few weeks were crazy and filled with preparations and action, now it was a moment to unwind. Something she dreaded the most.

 

She sighed as she laid down against the rooftop to observe the night sky. People say that night is always the best time to think, which didn't bode well for her, as in her type of work, night was the most active time. It was hard to decide whenever this was true or not, as she long forgot how it was to function at day and sleep at night.

 

There were plenty of factors that could easily cloud this theory. Life got complicated, hence why she decided to do what she was doing all this time and nothing makes you as thoughtful as complicated life. Afterall it delivers things to think about, does it not?

 

Moments like these were a blessing, where she could distract herself from the real issue. This issue occurred long ago, yet for all this time it managed to shift and change shape, however strange that made it sounds.

 

The issue was her place in the world, among people, her people. Among her friends, and finally inside a single heart.

 

Could she forgive humans? Or did she already? Did she understood that not everyone's the same? Or perhaps she simply understood that Adam's way was not the way to achieve equality. This she was still unsure.

 

Where is her place among her own people? Was she trying to redeem herself? If so, was it for her own sake? Or to still be accepted among her own people. Perhaps it was just to redeem herself in a pair of amber eyes and nothing else mattered.

 

Friends, did she even have friends? She has one friend, thats for sure. Yet, did she really have any group of friends? Anyone? All her associates were white fang, it didn't matter if they joined their cause or not, it remained awkward at best. And were they even her friends to begin with? Or just soldiers in this war, war against her own people and humans.

 

Finally there was Blake.

 

At that she closed her eyes and had to focus not to let these emotion overpower her. This was not the time or place to get sad and worse, to cry.

 

Still, what else was there to do and feel about that particular issue? Things were stable at best, fake at worst. She wasn't sure. It was all great up till she showed up, and then all these things came back from the depth of her soul to the surface of her heart.

 

Then there was the madness of the past month and here she was, laying on a rooftop of a foreign nation, thinking about her feelings towards her.

 

Towards Blake.

 

"Doesn't this seem familiar?" There it was, as if summoned. Her amused voice ringing inside her ears as she sat up.

 

"What do you mean?" She didn't look back to see her. Just her sight made the emotional content of her heart mix and twist.

 

"Aside from the fact that I'm more aware that you were looking for me, meeting on a rooftop after something big happened? I hope this isn't your idea of a perfect date." Blake joked, and just hearing these words made her stomach feel as if someone grabbed her stomach.

 

She clenched her jaw and looked at the catgirl. "Don't joke about things like that, you know how I feel." She saw the cocky smile disappear from Blake's face as she nodded and approached her.

 

"I know, but I got you to look at me, which I claim a success. You always seem to look away from me whenever we're alone, as rare as that is." The cat faunus explained as she sat next to her.

 

"It's not my fault." This was true, it wasn't her fault that she felt the way she did. If she had any control? Long ago she would throw these feelings away.

 

"I know, I'm sorry." Blake brought her legs and hugged them against her chest, only to lay her head down against her knees and smile as she looked at her. "I just prefer when you're not avoiding me in any manner."

 

"I'm not avoiding you, I just..." What was she doing? Whenever she thought about this, it was all simple. Yet when it came to explaining herself verbally, she couldn't find the correct words, as if she forgot everything she thought through her endless, sleepless nights.

 

"You're running away." While the words sounded as if it was accusing her of something, the tone of voice of the catgirl sounded amused. "If anything? I know something about running away. It's to avoid your issues."

 

"Unlike you I faced my issue, and you know very well that I can't do anything more about them." She frowned and clenched her fists as she looked over the other girl.

 

Her reaction and perhaps the words she used had to surprise the taller girl, but after the initial surprise was over she didn't seem mad, annoyed or upset. No, she just offered a smile. "I know." Was all she said.

 

There was a lingering silence as they both sat there just staring at the night sky and at the events going down below. The initial celebration was slowly fading away, as everyone was exhausted, both physically, but more likely mentally and emotionally. Not everyday do you go out there to fight your own brothers and sisters.

 

Blake's voice broke the silence between them. "Ilia, what would you like? What would make you happy?" That question caught her off guard.

 

She chuckled, but it sounded so dry. "I want to be closer to you."

 

"How close?"

 

At first she was confused, since the question was so... weird. Yet, as the seconds passed she grew more and more frustrated at it. She knew exactly what she meant by that, what she wanted. This frustration grew inside of her, and she wasn't even sure what to do.

 

She wanted to scream, cry, throw herself at the faunus besides her, for what reason not even her mind could comprehend. Yet when the time to deliver her answer came, all that she could do was to just calmly answer.

 

"As close as possible." Weak, she sounded so weak. Who knew that just thinking and... Feeling could be this exhausting, but here she was, slowly growing indifferent and passive to the outside world. Tired.

 

She tilted her head to look away from the other girl and closed her eyes. Seconds after that she heard her stand up. This pained her heart, as she loved to have Blake by her side, like an addiction, she knew it was ruining her, but the feeling was just too much, not to mention the emptiness she felt whenever she wasn't by her side.

 

Yet that was not what happened, as she felt a pair of arms hug her from behind. Hug her, and pull her closer, so that she could feel her back rest against the other girl's chest. She felt Blake's arm wrap themselves around her waist, and move higher to cross them at the level of her chest. The cat girl leaning over and resting her head against her shoulder.

 

"Is this close enough?" She asked, and because she must have been aware that her mouth was so close to her ear, she spoke in a whisper. Yet the husky voice made her shiver as she felt her throat grow dry, unable to speak. She wasn't sure if her spots caught on with her feelings, most likely they did, as they glowed radiant pink by now.

 

Unable to speak, all she could do was to use her head to answer Blake's question. She shook it.

 

"I'm afraid the only way we could get closer is if we took off our clothes." At the catgirl's words she had to bite her cheek to remain conscious and focus enough to even comprehend her words.

 

She felt her heart increase the pace at which it was beating, her breathing growing shallow and her mind growing even more numb to any sort of outside sensations.

 

She didn't really want this, not that she was opposed to such things. Of course she knew that this sort of behaviour was... Normal. Yet she didn't really crave that part of relationship, perhaps later as a dessert to the main course.

 

Still it was the idea combined with that husky voice Blake proposed it with that made her... Made her like this, however she could define this state of mind as.

 

While it felt like eternity, it couldn't be more than ten seconds before she could once more speak. "It's not funny, Blake." She had to clear her throat after she spoke.

 

"I know, I'm sorry." She apologized. "To be honest it only occured to me how it sounded after I said it. I meant that clothes are the only barrier that we could be physically closer. I didn't mean it like that." She could feel the catgirl shrug.

 

"You know I didn't mean physically closer." She sighed, although she couldn't help but lean a bit more against the taller girl. She enjoyed it, this feeling. Once more Blake's body warmth was there to remind her how cold nights could really be.

 

"I know." Came a simple answer, and for a moment there was only silence. It made her think of something to say to break it, as she grew more anxious with each passing moment that this feeling of being embraced by this girl would go away. Yet Blake forestall her in this.

 

"You know that you were the final straw in me understanding that everyone change? And that change is inevitable." Ilia blinked at that. Was she trying to change the subject, or was this another case of her word games?

 

"How?" She simply asked, trying to not be as easily played as she usually was by the catgirl's words.

 

"All this started because of him changing." She heard the other girl inhale deeply, of course she understood who this 'him' was.

 

"It made me realize something, and at the same time? It made me afraid of everything. Because everything changes. People, relationship between people, outlooks on life or on some specific aspects of life. Everything, and I was trying to avoid it, to escape it. In hindsight it was incredibly stupid to even attempt." The girl sighed.

 

"A lot of things are stupid in hindsight." she shrugged, it's not as if she didn't do plenty of stupid in her past.

 

"I know, as I came to this realization I needed some proof that this change could be for better. Sadly as I came back home, it just proved my initial point, that change always brought misery. Yet after everything that happened i decided that if that's how life is, I would no longer try to run away. I'd stand against this change." The catgirl chuckled, and just that sound made her smile, even if the topic at hand was no laughing matter.

 

"Then you appeared. With you I understood that there was a good change and a bad change, and I was just blindly seeing gray, where i should see white and black. It was that moment where I knew that we had to stop the bad change from happening, that we had to do everything in our power to make the good change happen." While it was clear what Blake was saying, it still remained a mystery for her WHY she was saying this, why right now? Was this the only reason she came to find her? Is to thank her for... This. For being an example.

 

"You're making it sound all very simple." She decided to just play along for now, as if this didn't have any additional layer. Perhaps it didn't, who knew what was under that pair of cat ears.

 

"I know, that's what's worst in this situation. It's hard to say what's good and what's bad, I think that's the general issue about any kind of morality. The barricade thing." She raised a brow at that.

 

"Barricade thing?" She instinctively wanted to turn around to look at the girl, but stopped at the last moment as to not disturb the position they were currently in.

 

"Mmhm, we, on our side of the barricade, we think that we're the good guys. Those other people on the other side, they think they are the good guys. Question is, who's right and who's wrong? Or even more difficult question, who's to judge?" It was her time to sigh. This went from an emotionally confusing encounter to a very deep and philosophical discussion, frankly she wasn't sure how to feel about this weird turn.

 

"I think that's why people say that the winner writes history. People will look back at what happened here and decide who was the bad guy and who was the good guy. It's scary once you understand that you can't be sure if what you're doing now is for better or worse." She had to know, she had to understand why all of this was being said.

 

"Blake? Why... Are you telling me all this?" As she asked she finally shifted her position to look behind her, to see the other girl's face. She saw her amber eyes and a soft smile on her lips.

 

"Because of what you told me back home." She shrugged, although the smile never left her lips.

 

With that Ilia rested her back once more against Blake's chest with a heavy sigh. This was once more going back into the emotional topic, and once more she wasn't sure which one was better.

 

"Why did you agree to kiss me, Ilia?" Among many things that could be asked, this particular question didn't really mean much to her. Wasn't it obvious already?

 

"What do you mean?" She asked. She knew that this wasn't as simple as it sounded, there was more to it.

 

"I told you that it could end like it was up till now. Yet you agreed, why?" There was pure curiosity in Blake's voice.

 

Why did she agree to that? Was it really because she wanted to know if she loved her? Or did she already knew and it was just to taste a bit of happiness... Taste.

 

"It was like biting into a sinful fruit." She decided to go with the taste route to explain it. Both can play weird word games, even if hers was primitive and lead to nothing but to avoid admitting something in a direct manner.

 

"It was tempting, and I knew what I was getting into. Still, I was curious. Curious and... Tired, of not getting anything from life. I decided that if I was to taste happiness even if for a moment, I could pay any price for it." She sighed, it sounded like she was talking about some drug addiction now. Perhaps love was the worst of all drugs.

 

"Was it worth it?" Came another simple question from the catgirl.

 

Ilia shrugged at first, only to follow up with a proper answer. "When I bit into it, it tasted so sweet I almost felt like I would die. Addicting, like if I had it too often I would not be able to function without it any longer. After the initial sweetness started to fade, came the bitter aftertaste. Soon it overwhelmed my heart, and here I am." She felt cold, but not because of the night chill in the air. It was a different kind of cold, a lonely kind.

 

"Would you taste it again if you could?" Blake's question made her feel as if her heart had stopped for a few seconds. Was she offering to do it again?

 

She shook her head. "I... Blake, this shouldn't happen again, not like this." She felt guilty, but deep down she knew this to be true. This wasn't a solution, not something that could solve anything in the long run.

 

"You still didn't answer my question, would you?" The catgirl was persistent, and she felt her will slowly crumbling.

 

"I don't know. I'm scared that I would get addicted to it, and without being sure I could get... my daily dose? I don't think I would do it." She hoped this would stop, Blake's question were slowly penetrating her defenses, soon she would give out. While she trusted Blake, she knew that emotions and desires were hard to control, and in case the catgirl was filled with those? This could end up poorly for both of them.

 

"I see..." Luckly that was all about this specific subject that the cat faunus had to say, and she was glad for this. She was scared of what would happen if she indeed got too used in this sort of affection. What if it would become something regular? Grow into something more, without having a proper ground to bloom into something beautiful.

 

What if it became about the physical aspect, and completely deny the emotional part.

 

She shook her head, no. Blake wasn't like this, she was just leading her someway. She was leading to something with all these questions. She refuses to believe that the girl she fell in love with is so shallow.

 

"Ilia? You know that if we got together it would be a change for... Everyone, right?" The catgirl once more placed her head gently against the smaller girl's shoulder, as she whispered softly into her ear.

 

"I know." She answered, not sure what else to say. The subject of change was already discussed, what else was there to add?

 

"Do you think it would be a good or a bad change?" At her question she closed her eyes and remained silent. This wasn't a simple question. Not because picking either of these was hard, but because it wasn't the question Blake was asking.

 

Sure, if they got together it would make her the happiest faunus there is. Yet there were consequences, relationship like this could be used against them. Not to mention that neither of them is living a safe life. Then there's past relationships of Blake, her affiliations and her parents.

 

"I think everything has a good and bad side to it. Everything will bring something good and something bad." The catgirl's reaction wasn't what she expected to hear. It was a giggle, a short one, but still. Was she laughing at her?

 

"You should meet Ruby, I doubt she could believe that something like love could bring anything but happiness, or at least it should." It sounded like whoever this Ruby was, she was a very... Idealistic person. If only that concept was true.

 

"That's very optimistic of her." She didn't want to insult any of her friends, besides there was nothing wrong in thinking like this. Too many cynical people around as it is.

 

"Would you want to face these changes? These consequences if you had the choice?" That made her raise her brow. Was she... No, impossible. Or maybe?

 

"Blake, what... What are you..." She was silenced by a single digit placed on top of her lips.

 

"Just answer me, Ilia, would you?" Since there was something technically blocking her lips from speaking, she closed her eyes for a moment, as if the next thing she was about to do required willpower and courage like nothing she did before. She opened her eyes only to look behind and into Blake's amber orbs.

 

She nodded.

 

She saw Blake smile, a tiny smile, which soon grew bigger. "Alright." With that she moved one of her arms to rub the back of her head. "This is... Far less romantic than I thought any kind of confession would be." Her words were enough for Ilia.

 

As she turned fully to face Blake and pounced her, clinging herself to the catgirl. It was enough, she understood. "Thank you." She said against the other girl's chest as she hugged herself tightly, afraid to let go in case the other girl was about to escape, to disappear from her life.

 

She heard the other girl chuckle. "I'm not going anywhere." Blake's arms wrapped themselves around her, and she felt happy, she felt safe. She didn't care what was to happen next. In the next hour, day or months. She was happy, and she just gained a permanent source for her happiness.

 

Soon she felt the girl underneath her move, and not a gentle movement, she tumbled with her around, up till she ended up underneath the catgirl. She felt the heat move into her cheeks, as her spots were a bright pink color.

 

Yet as she looked into Blake's eyes she didn't see lust or desire. She saw what she always did, the girl that she loved for such a long time.

 

"Is this close enough?" The catgirl asked as she smiled. At first her brain was too occupied to understand the real meaning of her question, but before she could nod she caught up to that. Blake wasn't asking for that, she was asking for permission.

 

She shook her head, and as soon as she did, she saw the other girl start leaning down. She closed her eyes just like last time, ready for their lips to touch.

 

As soon as she felt it, she couldn't help but let out a soft moan, all this emotional buildup finally paying off inside her chest, and it felt wonderful.

 

She felt Blake's hands take hold of hers, as their fingers entangled with each other's. The taller girl tilted her head and parted her lips, and she didn't wait for any sort of signal but immediately parted her own. Soon their tongues meet halfway there, and she felt a shiver ran through her entire body.

 

It was no longer a sinful fruit, no. It was a sweet fruit that left no bitter aftertaste. The only downside was that it would make her crave for more, but hopefully? She'd have a steady dosage to remain happy and content.

 

Soon they parted, the kiss lasting a short moment due to it being a symbol of... Of what? Their relationship? Were they a thing now? Just that thought made her shiver.

 

The catgirl didn't move too far, only enough so that she could speak, as she felt her nose against her own. "Is this close enough?"

 

At that she couldn't help but nod. This was perfect.

 

"Because we still could get past that last barrier." Blake moved up a bit, enough so that Ilia could see her smirk.

 

"What?" The smaller girl raised a brow, only for her eyes to grow wide. "B-Blake! It's still not funny!" She blushed at the thought of what Blake was insinuating.

 

The catgirl laughed at her reaction, and while she was annoyed it didn't take her long before she joined the other girl in her laughter. Their laughter died after a moment, and they smiled, looking into each other's eyes.

 

Blake leaned down once more, but stopped as their noses touched. "I love you, Ilia."

 

"I love you too, Blake."

 

With that said, their lips connected once more. She was happy.

 

She was finally close enough to Blake.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was a weird story for me to write. 
> 
> Mostly it was to… Celebrate? Ending of volume 5. I won’t say anything more about v5, it was what it was, and hopefully we can move on and HOPEFULLY we can receive a better content with the upcoming volumes. Although I’m afraid since they’re launching another “serious’ series which might take resources from RWBY … 
> 
> Second, I like that Ilia survived, a lot of people (Me included) were afraid she would die for some reason, but nope! At least not yet. I like her, hope she sticks around the main group and we can learn more about her.
> 
> While I support Ilia/Blake ship, this was more for myself, this story that is. And not because I wanted some fluff or whatever. No.
> 
> This was to help me get a grasp on the new Blake. Because the current Blake is nothing like the old one. She no longer is this quiet, introverted cat girl, she became something different. I did the same with Yang prior to v5 with some of my stories to also get a grasp on her character. Luckly v5 delivered a great bit of information on Yang, so that’s no longer neccesary. Sadly Blake now is in a weird spot, at least for me. I’ll be glad to discuss her with anyone if someone understands her better or doesn’t seem to see the issue I do with her.
> 
> Lastly, and this is personal, I decided to write this, or rather finally sat down to write this, as a way to cope with how awful my day was. It was really awful, to the point I turned off my phone and any kind of messenger I used (Discord woo!) and just sat down and wrote. This and some other things, but this was my main thing I wanted to work on. Why? Because long ago I thought that offering things to others is a much better way of dealing with your own personal negative moods. I know im just offering my crappy stories, but hey! Hopefuly at least one person (Me not included) will find tihs entertaining.
> 
> With this being said, I hope you enjoyed this story! Please let me know what you thought about the story, how I portrayed Blake and most importantly how i portrayed Ilia, she’s still iffy for me to grasp. I didn’t try to make her edgy or emo or nothing like that, but you have to admit she’s in a weird spot right now hah. So please do leave a comment/review and let me know how I did! With them and with the story in general!


End file.
